credit: Marvel Comics
Throughout the history of the Marvel Universe, there have been many great heroes and plenty of those who are controversial in nature and might need to back up and think about what they’re doing and how they’re doing it. When it comes to educating others and showing them how to live their lives, a lot of Marvel heroes might be adequate to be great teachers, but there are some who shouldn’t teach anyone, no matter what level of education one might be thinking about. Some heroes simply aren’t the type of role models that people need since they’re a little too brash, a bit too cocky, and they don’t tend to think of anything or anyone but themselves. The funny thing is that there are heroes out there that do plenty of good, but they’re otherwise kind of garbage human beings that think too much about themselves and the glory that’s heaped on their names. There is a reason why people say not to meet your heroes.
Here are five Marvel superheroes that would be horrible teachers.
5. Human Torch
credit: Marvel Comics
Johnny Storm has been known as kind of a hothead for quite a while, no pun intended. The brother of Sue Richards, aka the Invisible Woman, and member of the Fantastic Four, has almost always been seen as the kind of hotshot that a lot of people would agree is a bit temperamental and full of himself in more than one way. The live-action movies have made it clear that he’s a bit arrogant, even if he can be a decent person from time to time. But as a teacher, it feels as though he’d be a little too self-centered to take an educating position seriously, and it’s easy to think that he’d get a lot of students in trouble by giving them advice that was less than useful. Plus, thinking that he’d have the patience to teach anyone kind of implies that he’s not a man-child, which he’s always been.
4. Sentry
credit: Marvel Comics
The mental instability of this guy is more than enough to make him a less than a reliable educator, and yet it’s not such a massive impediment when it comes to his being a hero. Sentry is one of the more powerful individuals in the Marvel Universe, and it’s fair to say that he might be too powerful for the MCU. But when it comes to educating anyone on anything that has to do with real life, it’s very easy to say that he might not be the guy to be put in such a stressful position. The fact that he can go toe to toe with World Breaker Hulk and has the type of power that would put him on par with more than a few cosmic entities doesn’t mean that he would be capable of taking on the mental stress of teaching a student, let alone a classroom.
3. Tony Stark/Iron Man
credit: MCU
It’s been pointed out more than a dozen times that Tony Stark is a narcissist, so of course, it’s worth pointing it out again. This quality, unfortunately, wouldn’t be one of the qualities that makes him a great educator since he doesn’t have a lot of patience for those that can’t follow the frantic pace at which his mind works. The fact that he is passive-aggressive and is usually able to come up with a biting quip on command makes him a bit endearing, but the anxiety he deals with and the fact that he’s bound to get bored doing one thing over and over makes it feel as though he wouldn’t be that great in a classroom. Even taking people on field trips around the world feels like it would get old after a while. In other words, Tony isn’t really cut out for teaching.
2. Speedball
credit: Marvel Comics
Speedball has almost always been the type of character that’s a nice guy and easy to get along with, but he isn’t exactly the most dependable human being since he’s always talking and very rarely listening. The fact that he’s been shown to have such disregard for the safety of others sometimes is why Civil War was such a massive deal in the Marvel Universe. The fact that the New Warriors didn’t do their homework on the villains they were going after makes it clear that Speedball is the type of guy that was seeking popularity and not much else. He did manage to repent his ways when he became Penance, but he’s still not the type of guy one wants in the classroom.
1. The Punisher
credit: Marvel Comics
I mean, does it really need to be said? Frank Castle could teach people a lot about killing, espionage, and anything that comes with the territory when the discussion leans toward revenge and murder. But despite all of the Punisher’s skills, it’s fair to state that he wouldn’t be the best individual to put in a classroom. This guy might not be as insane as Captain America believed, but he most definitely has a few screw loose and has a serious temper issue that wouldn’t be good to mix with a classroom setting. He’s not a dumb or savage individual, but a classroom isn’t where he belongs.
Not every hero can multitask.