The Real Dom Perignon Wasn’t As Fancy As You’d Think

The Real Dom Perignon Wasn’t As Fancy As You’d Think

Today, the name Dom Perignon inspires immediate visions of materialistic, borderline hedonistic excess. Arms clanging with bangles and watches worth a small mortgage. Club bouncers that look like theyd have a fair chance against John Wick looking at your shoes with disdain. Buckets of ice at weddings you wouldnt make it through the door of without a waiters uniform on. Its a quaffable status symbol, a signal that youve, in some form, made it. 

In short, the last word anyone would use to describe Dom Perignon is “monastic.”

Yet, that’s exactly who Dom Perignon himself was. He wasnt a suited, high-society vintner, but a simple Benedictine monk with a remarkable knack for making bubbly wine. He didnt invent champagne, as is sometimes erroneously repeated, but he was responsible for massive developments in making it a wine of actual repute. The same champagne that serves as set dressing in music videos was cooked up by Perignon at the Abbey of Hautvillers in Epernay, France. It existed before him, being invented by a woman whose name is also still in the champagne sphere, Widow Clicquot, but Perignon overhauled practically the entire process.

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Unsurprisingly then, Perignons champagne was highly valued during his lifetime as well, and quickly became a favorite of French royals. You could even argue he had a hand in the rise of branding altogether, as he was among the first winemakers to put their own name on the label instead of a vineyard or region, which isn’t exactly humble. Still, as much clout as he might have had, he was content to live in peace at the abbey, not rubbing elbows with the many rich fans of his product.

So, if on a special occasion these days, you find yourself with a flute of Dom Perignon in hand, know that youre honoring his memory. And, of course, because human nature seeks to prey and kill anything pure, that youre fattening the pockets of Bernard Arnault, the literal richest man in the world, who owns LVMH (Moet Hennessy Louis Vuitton), which was created by a 1987 merger of Moet & Chandon, Dom Perignon and Hennessy. 

From monks to mergers, in accordance with the modern religion of money. Cheers!

Alexandre Campolina Campola

A statue of a monk, standing non-ironically in front of the headquarters of the most valuable company in the world.

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