If the thought of “where do men ejaculate when they masturbate?” keeps you up at night, we are more alike than we are different. For me, it all started when I listened to a podcast episode of “Girls Gotta Eat” and heard two men who were guests talk about their masturbating habits. (It should come as no surprise that these same guests also have their own podcast called “Stiff Socks.”)
One of the guests mentioned that his go-to place to come when he masturbates is in a shoe box — what some people actually refer to as a “cumbox.” The other said he prefers to come on the floor. (Yes, the floor.) He further explained it would be wise for the general population to never step barefoot onto a hotel floor for fear of what’s stuck in the carpet. Do with that what you will.
Now as someone who grew up without brothers, these responses have me completely floored. I’ve never really thought too deeply about semen or where men orgasm when they masturbate. I don’t have any memories of picking up a magazine with stuck-together pages, and I’ve never had a run-in with a sticky sock in the laundry basket either.
“The most convenient spot: into the toilet.”
In fact, until I listened to that podcast episode, I would lie awake at night thinking about what strawberry jelly I was going to buy the next day or what the meaning of life is. But now, the concept of where men orgasm when they masturbate lives in my mind rent-free.
So if you’re like me and still feeling some type of way about the fact that some grown men just fully come on the floor, then you’ll want to hear other men’s responses when I asked them: “where is your go-to place to orgasm while masturbating?” Because while I don’t think a shoe-box-turned-semen-storage place is necessarily the norm — or something even half of men in this world do — some of these answers may still surprise you.
Where Do Men Come When They Masturbate?
“Sometimes it’s while I’m sitting on my office chair into a paper towel. Sometimes it’s directly into the toilet while I’m already sitting on it.” — Riley*
“I typically just do it while laying on my back and have it go on my stomach before a shower. That way, I don’t have to deal with the hassle of using a skeet sheet or toilet paper.” — Hayden
“Usually in the shower or Kleenex, whichever is convenient.” — Alex
“Doesn’t everyone use tissues?” — John*
“I always prefer to ejaculate in the sink because I like to watch myself while masturbating, and also get an idea about the quality and quantity of my sperm.” — Adam
“Usually a few squares of toilet paper that I flush in the toilet after. Hassle-free clean up.” — Jordy
“The most convenient spot: directly into the toilet.” — Harrison*
“Whatever I can find the fastest. A tissue. A towel. Whatever is next to me.” — Julian
“Dirty underwear from my laundry basket.” — Taylor
“A shoe box so I don’t have to wash dirty socks or waste tissue paper.” — Will*
*Names have been changed