The ‘Friends’ alum — who started dating the Snow Patrol singer in 2013 — admitted that she “didn’t know it was coming,” adding that she was “so shocked” and “in so much pain” over her then-fiancé’s “surprise.”
Courteney Cox is recalling the time her partner, Johnny McDaid, ended their relationship during couples therapy.
During an appearance on the Minnie Questions with Minnie Driver podcast, the Friends alum — who started dating the Snow Patrol singer in 2013 — detailed the incident, which she said went down “about five years ago,” and explained why she’s ultimately “thankful” that McDaid called off their engagement at the time.
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“So three years in, we broke up and it was really intense,” Cox, 59, told Driver. “We broke up in therapy. I didn’t know it was coming, whether I should have or not, it was just like we went to this therapist to talk about our boundaries — what we could and couldn’t accept about each other.”
“Instead, he just broke up within the first minute,” she continued. “And I was like, ‘What?’ And we were engaged. And I was so shocked. I was in so much pain.”
The actress admitted that she is not a fan of surprises. “He’s an incredible human being, so he wasn’t trying to surprise,” she explained. “He was in that much pain in the relationship. There was that much that needed to be dealt with that he had to protect himself around his heart.”
Cox added, “So as opposed to like going ‘F–k him,’ getting in this mode of anger, I leant in and I did the most work on myself by far. I learned how to reclaim my voice, boundaries. What were my motives in life — like, what was my part in this?
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Since the split helped her personally and in her relationship with McDaid, she said she’s grateful that they briefly called it quits.
“I’m so thankful for that break-up,” Cox explained, “When we got back together it was a different relationship, but also because it really taught me how I operated in the world. What were the things from my childhood that I needed? Like, whether it was to be adored by men or that I didn’t know how to let go to be in a relationship. To not take things personally, ,y boundaries. I just went into myself and I had a great therapist.”
The Scream actress said she continued to see the same therapist herself.
“I kept seeing him, the one that we met on the break-up day. And it was brutal to go to his office after that for a while,” she recalled. “But then it was great. And I’m really thankful a) nothing will ever hurt me that bad again, and b) most of all, most importantly, I completely changed.”
Cox and McDaid, 47, first began dating in fall 2013, and announced their engagement the following June. The couple reportedly ended their engagement in November 2015, before later reconciling in 2016. While they have been together since, they are still no longer engaged.
During her conversation with Driver, Cox praised McDaid’s “bravery” to break up with her in that therapy session several years ago.
“It takes a lot of bravery to end something that has so much passion, or end anything,” she explained. “Any kind of relationship. It’s so much easier just to stay and ride things out and make excuses, and, you know, fear of pain is just too much to handle. But once you are bold enough to make decisions and go through the pain, you can’t go around it. So just go through it, and then when you do everything’s easier.”
“I’m thankful that Johnny was so bold and brave because it was life-changing for me, and I’m sure for him,” she added.
