“I’ve never felt so alive! I’m erect for the first time in 15 years!,” O’Brien exclaimed while rubbing his nipples with hot sauce during his unhinged episode of Hot Ones
Conan O’Brien created 27 minutes of pure comedy gold during the season finale of Hot Ones with host Sean Evans — which many are labelling the show’s best episode yet.
The 60-year-old host initially warned Evans of his aversion to spice as O’Brien sat with ten bottles of hot sauce before him.
“I grew up in an Irish house,” O’Brien prefaced. “An Irish Catholic home in Boston. I never saw a spice till I was about 52 years old. So I’m terrible with hot food. I grew up on tasteless food. So this is a whole new experience for me.”
However, he started out strong overly confident, mocking past stars who tapped out before him.
With his alleged personal physician on hand, Dr. Arroyo — a comedy bit that continued throughout the episode — O’Brien’s baseline temperature began at 97.9 degrees and ended two degrees higher when he concluded his hot sauce consumption.
O’Brien shockingly took the line-up of hot sauces like a true professional, becoming more and more candid with his physical comedy as he made his way further up in “Scoville levels”, adding each finished wing to his pocket as memorabilia from his accomplishment.
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“I don’t think there’s a wing here that I can’t eat like it’s ice cream,” the former late-night host boasted. “Seriously, I don’t think there’s a wing on this table that I cannot devour like it’s cool whipped cream!”
He then gave insights into his earlier role as a late night host, opened up about a water buffalo incident and recalled writing Saturday Night Live sketches at David Letterman’s desk in the ’90s, before he ended up taking over for Letterman as host of Late Night — much to his surprise.
By this point the spice level had clearly increased — but it didn’t deter O’Brien, who covered his next week in sauce, before drinking drinking directly from the bottle, sparking concern from Hot Sauce veteran, Evans.
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As he attempted to keep up with his guest, Evans was forced to also add more as O’Brien screamed at him, “Come on, man, are we doing this or not?! Are we doing this or not?! What’s the point of even being alive if we can’t do this?!”
The taunting didn’t last too long, however, as the hot sauce came back to bite O’Brien in the butt.
“This one, I’m not gonna lie, I’m feeling it a little bit… it’s just starting to peek through,” he said with hot sauce around his face. “I don’t have a lot of regrets in my career … but pouring this onto the wing and then licking it off… in retrospect… I’m starting to feel some sensations.”
Sensations or not, he still kept going, covering a wing and hands with the next sauce, before rubbing them all over nipples — hidden under a button-up shirt — as he exclaimed, “I’ve never felt so alive! I’m erect for the first time in 15 years!”
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As for the grand finale, O’Brien had more than just a dab of the hottest sauce, “The Last Dab.”
“I’m fine! I’m perfectly f—ing fine!,” O’Brien said before spinning in circles on his chair and answering Evans’ final question in chaotic fashion.
YouTube comments flooded the video within hours of it being uploaded and it’s clear O’Brien did not disappoint.
“This episode shows just how massively the cable networks missed out on Conan. League of his own. Legend,” one commenter said.
Another added, “Conan not only understood the assignment, he rewrote the rules. He’s the king. One of the best episodes ever.”
Watch the madness unfold above!
