Christmas stockings seem like the invention of an overzealous child — the gift-giving equivalent of adding a new rule to tag by the kid whose party it is, with a clear advantage for him and him only. “Yes, I get regular presents, but then there’s also a sock, and if a present’s small, it goes in there and it doesn’t count.” A child who had a new pencil case considered as part of his Christmas gift total and had to ensure that such small kindnesses wouldn’t get in the way of his PlayStation ever again.
That, or an attempt by Big Chocolate to make sure they could worm their way into holiday spending outside of Santa-shaped Easter Rabbit knockoffs and those inexplicable chocolate oranges.
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But enemies of corporate holiday takeovers, rejoice, because I have good news: Stockings, and the filling thereof, do indeed have legitimate folklore connections to the tale of Saint Nicholas, aka Santa Claus. It’s connected to an old tale about Saint Nick’s generosity when he supposedly helped a family of three daughters and their widowed father. The family was poor, and seeing as this was still the age of the dowry, the father was worried no one would marry his daughters without the customary payoff.
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Saint Nicholas heard townsfolk discussing their sad state of affairs, but knew the man wouldn’t take charity. So, he did what anyone looking to covertly donate money would: he slid down their chimney and filled some socks and shoes that were drying by the fire with golden coins.
It’s unclear why an unmarked envelope wouldn’t have done the trick, but St. Nick clearly had a flair for the dramatic. Nobody’s getting gold coins anymore, of course. Both because they’re expensive, and because children generally don’t yet have the distrust of world politics and latent anxiety that makes precious metals an attractive investment. Still, though, it was the thought that counts(ed).
Funnily enough, it turns out that my offhand joke about gross candy oranges manages to make itself relevant on the back of the same story. Some versions say he dropped off not gold coins, but gold balls. Oranges, chocolate or otherwise, left in the stockings are a clever if vastly less valuable tribute to those balls of legend.