Apparently in the U.S., the same populace that’s supposed to be trusted with assault rifles is also in mortal danger of eating a chocolate egg so fast they don’t realize there’s a massive plastic capsule inside. Instead, any Kinder eggs you’ll see stateside are a de-weaponized version called “Kinder Joy,” where the toy is in a separate compartment. Though, based on their opinion of American kids’ brain activity, you’d think they’d all end up trying to dry-swallow a tiny plastic bicycle anyways.
Weird Real Egg Laws
The U.S. notoriously has a draconian policy on raw foods, causing many things like beloved foreign cheeses to be stripped away from travelers at customs and stored in some room that I assume is basically El Dorado for rats. Eggs, too, come under the close watchful eye of the government, with a whole battery of bullshit required between cloaca and kitchen.
If you want to sell an egg in the U.S., it needs to be washed in at least 90 degree water, sprayed with a chemical sanitizer and dried. Sounds like added safety, until you find out that any moisture left on the egg after cleaning carries a high risk of bacterial growth, making improper transport or storage dangerous. Washing also removes a natural cuticle that protects the egg. Basically, the U.S. makes the eggs much more susceptible to bacteria just so they look nicer on the shelf. Britain and the EU, meanwhile, lets the eggs retain all the safety measures nature put there in the first place, and instead tells egg producers, “If your eggs are too dirty to sell, maybe clean your shit up?”