Catelynn Lowell Shares Birthday Post for Daughter Carly Amid Drama with Adoptive Parents

On Saturday, the Teen Mom star — who welcomed Carly with her husband Tyler Baltierra when they were just 16, and placed her into adoption — shared a sweet birthday tribute to Carly on Instagram.

“Today is Carly’s 15th birthday! I wonder what kind of day she’ll have and what she’ll do. I wish things were different so we could celebrate with her,” Catelynn, 32, captioned a black-and-white photo of herself and Tyler, 32, posing with Carly and their other children: Novalee, 9, Vaeda, 5, and Rya, 2.

“I hope she feels our love and has a great day! I look forward to knowing that one day we will be lucky enough to celebrate with her and B&T I can’t wait for that day!” she added. “@tylerbaltierramtv we are soooo blessed to have our girls!!”

Catelynn’s post comes amid apparent drama between her, Tyler, and Carly’s adoptive parents, Brandon and Teresa Davis. Catelynn and Tyler made the decision to place Carly into adoption when they were just 16, back in 2009 — and have had an up-and-down relationship with the Davises since.

Earlier this month, Catelynn took to her Instagram Stories to express her frustration after she and Tyler were allegedly denied the opportunity to visit their daughter.

“Adoption is wild … Being at the mercy of someone that can say no…” she wrote, per PEOPLE. “I know I chose this, there’s no need to tell me! I will just never understand how you say that you ‘love’ us and will always be ‘blessed’ for us … BUT you can’t take TWO days out of your entire year to just meet up for dinner and do a park or something small? Especially when we said we would travel to YALL?!”

“I know for me … people I LOVE and are blessed to have, I MAKE time for!” she added. “So now we most likely won’t see her until she’s 16 … And who knows if that will even happen …”

The next day, Tyler came to his wife’s defense after Catelynn received backlash over her negative comments about Brandon and Teresa, sharing a lengthy post on social media.

“I debated on whether or not I would address the post my wife made about not getting a visit with Carly. However after seeing the comments, opinions, & ‘theories’ about why this decision has been made, I felt compelled to address it,” he began.

“Carly is almost 15 years old. Throughout those 15 years, her parents have chosen not to have our (mutually agreed upon) annual visit, MULTIPLE times!” he continued. “This is nothing new or foreign to our story & there’s nothing we have done in our personal lives that has influenced this decision. Now is it always disappointing & hurtful when it happens? Yes of course. Is it sad? Yeah. But at the the end of the day, Brandon & Teresa are HER PARENTS! They are the only ones who have the authority to make these decisions.”

“We can waste our time asking questions, dissecting responses, & begging for an answer…but we are NOT entitled to it (regardless of how much we may believe/wish otherwise). All we can do is accept the decision without the requirement of an answer,” Tyler added. “We have to just trust that their decision is for the best interest of Carly. Because that is the honor, privilege, & gift we chose to give them when we decided that they would raise her & be her parents.”

The 16 & Pregnant alum went on to note that this “choice does not come without a human cost,” before opening up about the “pain” of giving up your child to someone else.

“Most will never know the pain of what it takes to fight against the most powerful, biological & instinctual nature that’s required to make that choice,” Tyler wrote. “Most will never know what it’s like to grow, nurture, love & carry such a beautiful perfect innocence like your own baby…only to painfully relinquish that natural bond to another to do what you know you can’t for the sake of your baby. It’s a pain that’s equal to death & I don’t wish it upon my worst enemy. At least with death, there’s a tragic finality to it…tragic yes, but it’s final. There’s no guessing, there’s no false hope, & there’s nothing you can do to bring them back or change it. But grieving your child while they still live is truly an unexplainable pain in so many ways, I won’t even attempt to put it into words.”

“So with that pain, inevitably comes emotional reactions & expressions. My wife fights this pain every day,” he continued. “Some days are a victory & some days are not. But her expressing that pain on those particular days when she is vulnerable, sad & at a loss, should not be used as an attack against her character. Or maybe I’m just bias, since she’s my wife who I love more than anything, but I have held her while this excruciating pain overtakes everything.”

Tyler concluded his post by asking followers to “be kind, “gentle” and “compassionate” toward Catelynn.

“I know the assumptions, criticism & judgments are all part of the territory when it comes to living your life in the ‘spotlight’ but we’re still human beings at the end of the day,” he said. “This whole thing is hard for everyone involved. We’re only human after all & I believe we all could use some more grace & understanding towards one another!”

Last summer, Catelynn and Tyler shared an emotional reunion with their daughter, which marked their first visit in over two years. Catelynn posted a black-and-white family photo from the reunion on Instagram at the time.

“Had an amazing visit with our girl ❤️ she’s funny, kind, SMART, goofy and STUNNING 😍,” Catelynn captioned the photo. “Adoption is hard and saying goodbye time and time again is soooo hard!!!!” she continued. “But seeing all of our girls together, getting to know Carly deeper and deeper each time and being with all four of our daughters is truly such a blessing!!!!”

She also added the hashtags #adoption #loveyou and #mygirls.

In an interview with TooFab in September, Catelynn and Tyler opened up about what it was like to reunite with Carly, sharing that they were overjoyed with how it went seeing all of their daughters together.

“It’s the best. It’s the best feeling in the world,” said Catelynn. “Getting to witness all of them together, hanging out and playing, and talking, for me it’s just a joy to see all four of my girls together, honestly.”

“For me, I explain it as feeling really magical. It feels out of this world. It feels everlasting,” gushed Tyler. “If I could just stop this moment for the rest of my life I would be totally content forever.”

“Watching all of them together brings up this joy that’s unexplainable” he continued. “That I wasn’t really expecting considering, just where she lives and that we’re not raising her. But when they get together it’s like, wow!”

“It’s like there’s been no time apart,” added Catelynn.

“It’s beautiful, and Carly is such a good, awesome older sister. Nurturing, loves all the girls, and gives them all this attention, and seeing them together is magical. I can’t explain it any other way.”