Seinfeld wasn’t typically known for weighing in on important issues that actually affect people’s lives — unless of course you consider masturbation contests and surgeries being disrupted by projectile Junior Mints to be “important issues.” But the sixth season episode “The Couch” dove head-first into the abortion debate. And also the far less-important “cheating on your girlfriend’s book club” debate.
The episode begins with Jerry and Elaine dining at Poppie’s restaurant. When Jerry mentions the name of a popular pizza chain, Elaine insists that he shouldn’t ever order from them again because “the owner contributes a lot of money to those fanatical anti-abortion groups.” After Elaine discovers that Poppie, the Italian culinary whiz with an aversion to hand washing, is also anti-choice, she storms out of the restaurant, as do several other diners.
This all builds to a scene in which Kramer and Poppie meet to discuss their “build your own pizza” restaurant and end up arguing over body autonomy via a pizza-based allegory, with Poppie arguing that “you can’t give people the right to choose any topping they want.”
“What gives you the right to tell me how I would make my pie?” Kramer passionately counters.
Viewers today might not be aware that the memorable storyline reflected an actual news story from the time, and it really did involve abortion and pizza.
According to Seinfeldia by Jennifer Keishin Armstrong, Larry David was inspired to write “The Couch” after learning that Domino’s founder and CEO Thomas Monaghan had donated “substantial amounts of money to anti-abortion groups,” including the extreme Operation Rescue and its “campaign of lawlessness.”
After Monaghan “helped finance a referendum drive ending Medicaid-funded abortions in Michigan,” the National Organization of Women called for a boycott of Domino’s in 1989. A spokesperson for the pizza chain argued that Domino’s as a company never actually supported any anti-abortion groups, and that the boycott could hurt franchisees who “might even be sympathetic to their cause.” But obviously Monaghan still profited from pizza sales and used said profit for his donations.
It’s unclear whether or not the Domino’s Noid was pro-choice or not.
Perhaps not coincidentally, Monaghan stepped down as the CEO of Domino’s that same year in order to “devote himself full time” to the Catholic Church. And he sold most of his stake in the company in 1998. But the controversy clearly still dogged Domino’s, seeing as how they had to address the issue in an early version of their online FAQ, which noted that “Domino’s Pizza LLC has never supported organizations on either side of the reproductive rights issue.”
But as far as we know, nobody involved with Domino’s ever got so stressed out about the boycott that they relieved themselves on a friend’s sofa.
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