Kevin Costner Opens Up About Feeling ‘Broken,’ ‘Bruised’ After Christine Baumgartner Divorce

Last year, Baumgartner, Costner’s wife of 18 years, Christine Baumgartner, filed for divorce from the actor, leading to a nasty back-and-forth that played out in the media. While he hasn’t said much about the split, in a new interview with GQ, reflected on everything going on in his life lately, including the divorce, his exit from Yellowstone and how he managed to make not one but two films in the process.

“There’s a lot that has happened,” the Yellowstone alum — who GQ noted “wasn’t inclined to talk much about” his divorce specifically — remarked. “I’m right now looking at myself in the dark and going, Are you going to f—ing stand up and finish? Get up. I’m the audience. Get up, Kevin.”

“Get the f–k up and deal with this and find the joy every day of seeing your kids play while you’re here — and then work your a– off to get this thing finished,” the father of seven, who shares three of his brood with Baumgartner, continued.

The exes are parents to Cayden, 17, Hayes, 15, and Grace, 14, while Costner is dad to Annie, 40, Lily, 38, and Joe, 36, from his marriage to Cindy Silva, and son, Liam, 28, whom he shares with ex-girlfriend, Bridget Rooney.

Between his divorce from Baumgartner, raising his youngest children and stepping away from the Yellowstone franchise to pursue the heavy lift that has been the two-part Horizon saga, Costner told GQ he’s had “so much” on his shoulders.

“Very serious stuff. And those things are very important. I have to deal with them. And I have to deal with them on a daily basis, emotionally, historically almost. And then there’s the immediate needs of children. I’m not going to list the things — I’m going to stop right there with them. That is my job, looking at that, and dealing with that,” Costner shared, before explaining how he’s doing his best to rise to the occasion.

“I’m not going to lose myself. I’ve taken big bites out of life, life’s taken big ones out of me, right? I’m not going to lose myself because I’ve been bruised. I have been, but I’m not going to lose myself. And what I’m going to do is — because we are now after the white whale, okay?”

No matter how “broken” Costner’s said he’s been personally, the responsibility that comes with his new western — which will be released in two parts over the summer — says he can’t let go of this theoretical rope that has him tethered to the project.

“I can’t let go of this rope no matter how much my heart’s on the ground, no matter how broken I may be on a daily basis, I can’t let go of this rope because if I do, this thing called Horizon will stop. And Horizon’s not more important than the other things in my life, but I do have a level of responsibility to those guys that invested with me, to the people that believe in me, to the people that want to work all four of these, and are willing to postpone other jobs on the hint that I might work,” he explained. “And so it doesn’t matter how much water’s hitting me in the face, I can’t let go of the rope that is this thing… Pull. Don’t just f—ing hold on. Pull the f—ing rope too.”

Costner’s comments come just months he and Baumgartner finalized their divorce in February. Both Costner and Baumgartner have reportedly moved on since the contentious split. The Bodyguard actor has been linked to singer Jewel, while Baumgartner has apparently been dating their former neighbor, Connor.

They each appear to be in good spirits, with Baumgartner spotted arm-in-arm with Connor earlier this month, and Costner hitting the Cannes Film Festival with five of his seven kids to promote Horizon‘s upcoming release.

Check out the pics 69-year-old actor and his family below.